Jst recently ek larki hum ek hi ride sy school jaty thy ,woh junior thi ,Uski abhi nayi-nayi shaadi hui thi, aur ek-do saal ke andar hi uske do babies ho gaye. Literally, MashaAllah, uska shohar usse itna pyaar karta tha. Woh dono naya ghar bana rahe thay, aur usi ghar ki chhat se raat ko woh gir kar faut ho gaya. So, jab maine yeh sab suna, toh mujhe itna dhakka laga.

Hum kya-kya plans banate hain, lekin hamari zindagi kitni likhi hai, humein nahi pata. Shab-e-Barat aati hai toh humein yaad dilaya jata hai ke Allah se dua karo, nawafil parho aur apni zindagi mein barkat aur khair maango. Kisi ka mohtaj na hona bhi Allah se maango.

Hum apni zindagi mein logon aur romance ko centre bana lete hain, lekin humein apni maut ka bhi pata nahi hota. Yeh duniya aakhirat ke muqable mein kitni temporary hai, phir bhi hum logon ki validation ke liye apni dignity aur values tak compromise kar dete hain. Close-proximity scenes hon ya koi temporary pleasure, apni integrity kabhi compromise na karo. Read Surah Mulk before sleeping.

Of course, psychology, life lessons, research aur duniya bhar ke logon ke experiences se bhi seekho. I see tons of cases like this. Lekin sabse pehle Islam ko rakho. Never compromise your values or your integrity.

Kindness without boundaries is exploitation. Islam humein boundaries rakhna, apni respect karwana, logon ko pehchanna aur khush-ikhlaaq rehna sikhata hai. Hazrat Ali se mansoob ek baat hai: Naram na bano ke log tumhein mod dein, aur itne sakht bhi na bano ke log tumhein tor dein.

Jahan tumhari values compromise ho rahi hon, wahan mat jao, chahe tumhein sone ki plate mein khana hi kyun na diya ja raha ho. Sabr ka matlab yeh nahi ke tum har cheez sehte raho. Kabhi-kabhi usi waqt, calmly aur wittily jawab dena zaroori hota hai, taake agle bande ko pata ho ke usne boundary cross ki hai.

Lekin yeh bhi ek skill hai: kaise apni baat light-hearted way mein kehni hai, kaise facial expressions control karne hain, kaise comfortably baat karte hue topic change kar dena hai. Iske liye social skills, conversational skills aur facial-expression control practice karo.

Apne private expressions ko record karke review karo. Rozana English ka ek chapter parho taake tumhari English aur fluency improve ho. Agar tumne decide kiya hai ke tumne soft femininity ke saath baat karni hai, toh achhe communicators ke expressions, tone aur conversational style observe karo. Apne purane dramatic expressions ko replace karo aur consciously practice karo. Repetition se woh habits banengi, aur phir dheere-dheere personality ka hissa ban jayengi.

Khush-ikhlaaqi aur soft expressions bohot matter karte hain. Literally, hum logon se tab bhi put off ho jaate hain jab woh baat karte hue munh banate hain. So, wohi cheez jab hum khud karte hain, toh doosron par bhi uska asar hota hai.

Soft exterior, but a firm, steel mindset. Rationally, objectively aur apne values, integrity, dignity, Islam, neuroscience, neuroplasticity aur interpersonal skills ko samajh kar decisions lo. Aur sabse pehle Islam ko rakho.

Surah Mulk raat ko parh kar soya karo. Hadees mein Surah Al-Mulk ki fazilat aur qabr ke azaab se hifazat ka zikr aata hai.

Romance ko apni life se de-centre karo. Tumne romance ko itna central bana diya hai ke apni growth, skills aur khushi peeche reh gayi hain. Apne aap ko grow karo. Jab tumhare paas skills hongi, tum apni capabilities aur apni value ko behtar samajh paoge.

Happiness is also a skill. Apne aap ke saath loyal raho. Apni physical health, emotional well-being aur personal growth ka khayal rakho. Healthy dopamine aur oxytocin ke liye halal aur healthy connections banao. Apne bhai aur walid ke saath hug karo, unke saath waqt guzaro aur apne family bonds strong karo.

Apni skills develop karo aur apne childhood attachment patterns ko heal karne par kaam karo. Maqsad yeh nahi ke tumhein kabhi kisi ki zaroorat hi na pade, balki yeh hai ke tum apni khushi, self-worth aur emotional stability ke liye sirf kisi doosre insaan par dependent na ho. Tum Islam ki boundaries mein reh kar bhi khush reh sakte ho aur duniya mein bhi apni dignity aur boundaries maintain kar sakte ho.

Hamesha dua karo ke Allah Ta'ala tumhein buri maut se bachaye, duniya aur aakhirat mein kamyabi de, aur dono jahan mein sarfarazi aur izzat ata farmaye. Ya Mu'izz Allah ka naam hai; Allah se izzat aur dignity ki dua maango.

Situationships, playboys aur temporary pleasures ke chakkar mein apni integrity kabhi lose mat karna. Nek aurat ko nek shohar milne ki umeed rakho, lekin apni worth ko kisi ke character ya apne naseeb ke baare mein assumptions se mat joro. Agar tum kisi ke saath relationship mein hote hue apni boundaries compromise kar rahe ho, toh yaad rakho ke aise patterns future relationships ko bhi affect kar sakte hain. Duniya mein insaan ko apne aamaal ki jawabdehi karni hoti hai.

And third, kisi ko judge mat karo. Islam humein badgumani, takabbur aur doosron par beja hukm lagane se bachna sikhata hai. Kisi ki situation ko samjhe baghair uske baare mein final judgement mat do. Zindagi kabhi bhi humein aisi situation mein daal sakti hai jahan humein apni soch par dobara ghour karna pade.

Deen ko samjhe baghair hum aksar zindagi ki thokron se seekhne par majboor ho jaate hain. Isliye Islam ko parho, samjho aur apni life mein apply karo. Apni dignity protect karo, apni skills develop karo, apni boundaries maintain karo aur apni zindagi ka centre Allah ko banao, na ke logon ki validation ya temporary romance ko.