If I find someone bit online in social area passing by, someone people have charming exterior. I will say, okay good looking. Oh, okay charming. I will not even bat an eye. But usually I don't look. But if I do, so I say, okay, okay attractive, move past. Or i take it as data to adapt ,voice expression demeanor composure ,But if I certain things I feel like they had soft exterior and expression that I can learn from, I can learn and adopt that. Only I analyze it through that perspective.i rarely vet attracted to someone anymore. Dont wanna lower my frequency if attention mil b rahi hai. I know its not intention and they dont ahve what i look for so in chezo men parh k over emotional then lower frequency daydream. Itna life ko mushkil kardia utna time ap socialize growth skills and akhirat and ibaadt kar lo gain kanowlege and aese ap sukoom or khush raho gy life. Nervous system stay relaxed ,even fan bn k liye i see ppl personality values,morals ,imagine partner and social circle , they need to have a personality. And for choosing a partner and being involved my emotions to that level, for that I have a very solid point. It should be rationally, strategically Islam that tells you. And also a psychological relationships. Because that person need to add a peace, calming state. I need to grow and heal my self outside of that as well. So if that person can bring value to me, to give peace to me, I can heal and grow more with that person instead of uski cheezon mein padi rahun. Then that should be a goal of getting married. And that too when I'm actually in a place of when I learn marriage skills, handling skills, how to deal with people, how to give comeback, that zone, then I will get married. Not out of desperation and loneliness. This is the worst mistake you can make. And also forget about marriage. Even situationship I don't want it to myself. I just socialize just for fun, to make friends, to talk with people for sure. When someone is come by and propose, I will evaluate. And as a woman, decision on your hand that you want that person or not. Sadqa do. Uske baad observe that person as well. Of course everything is aap Allah ke haath mein dete ho. Of course for that. But Allah giving you mind as well. Mind is the wonder, it's magic. Use that abilities to see and read people patterns. I don't daydream and fantasize of what we could be just because I see a certain charm of that person and they had a good exterior. But patterns matter a lot and what their ideology is, is capability, is how they handle conflict, how they handle situation, how their core values, their principles, their discipline, man having a less control, emotional control, self-control. Have a calm, composed and peaceful state of not only controlling himself but also developing a family. If you are in that state, please build that and also look forward to a partner who has that as well. Otherwise you are signing up for a doom marriage. Don't even put yourself in a situationship like that. Why you need to rack your nervous system which you built so hard for? And the more you invest yourself in situations like that, the more you lose your charm. Then one day you feel like why you are feeling like that? You lose it actually, lose, lose so much of your personality because of you keep investing onto the people, giving your emotions free rent for rent. Not have sequence of life correct which is first center of universe, Allah, then your growth and skills which is the purpose. And romantic obsession is the cause of lack of purpose, growth and skills. Everything is skills. Voice muscle is a skill, lifestyle habit is a skill, discipline is a skill, expressions skill, giggling skill, smile skills, neutral calm composure, elegance, sophistication, eloquence, communication, listening, witty comeback. Everything is a skill. It just you do it for one month consistently, repeatedly. It, you, it become part of your personality for your whole life and serves you for whole life, just for this is neuroplasticity. We are, we are because of the environment we consumed from childhood to till now. Now we have the capacity and free will what we want to become, what we has a potential of, what human brain has a potential of. We could become that. Just adopt, repeat. You become.